LOST: Phone FOUND: Self

My first reaction was, I wish it was my wallet.

Seriously. Two debit cards, one credit card, countless business cards, a couple hundred bucks and a beautiful Ellie Kai clutch? Yep, see ya later. I would have very much given up all that instead of my iPhone. But alas, it never works out that way. The things you don’t care about losing are the ones that stick around. And those that you think you can’t live without? Sometimes they are the first to go.

See, I’m connected. Losing my phone is like losing my right arm. My life revolves around digital marketing. Blogging, Facebook, WordPress, Twitter, Instagram, MailChimp… these are my  friends I see the most.

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I spend more time with them then anyone else. Hell, while I can cheat on most of them with my computer, Instagram and I have a phone-only relationship. And we’re together like 24/7. (seriously. sad.) My day to day routines begin with posting statuses and checking comments and likes… It continues with sending out emails and finding the best photos to repost. It ends with blogging my day and where I’ve been, and I go to bed right after I make a to do list of people to make social media mentions about tomorrow. It’s my job. And I love every second of it. I wouldn’t do it if I didn’t… BUT

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Things have kind of gotten out of hand. Literally. My phone was out of my hand and it slid into the recycling bin at the Post Office on (now not at all) Pleasant Street. I don’t know how I threw it out. I do know when. I was so tired of looking for it (of course it was on silent) that I decided the find my phone app would be more useful than my actual able body. (again, sad.)

Well, by the time I got home, realized my dire straights, and really began to ponder my life without the iPhoneiFell asleep. And woke up two hours later and called my phone to hear my away message (blech, I really need to change that. What is it about the sound of your own voice that makes you cringe as soon as your hear the “hi you’ve reached…” — put it on the to do list.)

And then the anxiety really set in.

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 ? what photos did I have on my phone?

 ? who’s numbers did I lose?

 ? oh my god, my music. now I have no music to listen to.

 ? eww, how many “is there anything in my teeth” selfies do I have on that phone?

 ? when was the  last time I backed up?

 ? wait, have I ever backed up?!

 ? holy shit, that stupid “this iPhone has not been backed up in 8 weeks message”

 ? oh my god, my emails

 ? oh my god, change every password to all social media.

 ? wait, I can’t instagram anything today?!

 ? shit, my calendar is now in my phone. hope I didn’t have any more meetings today.

 ? put up a post on facebook that says I lost my phone. make it funny so people don’t think you’re losing it.

 ? I’m losing it.

 ? Admit defeat.

 ? Nap Again.

…and wake. and write this…

But what it takes a good 24 hours to realize is how liberating losing the phone was. I slept better in the last nights than I have in months. I watched a teen movie marathon and never looked at my phone once (sure it wasn’t around but I was damn happy it wasn’t!) I ate a meal in peace. Went for a walk without listening to music or instagramming a photo of my steps in the beach. I didn’t have to worry about texting anyone back or saying that I wanted to just stay in for the night. I emailed a few people that I needed to. I used a landline to call my sisters and my dad. I fell asleep reading a book I’d been meaning to for months. I awoke with a clear head and had coffee on my deck and smelled the ocean. The world had moved on. I was still here. I had one message asking if I was okay and that was about it.

The best part? I got a lot of stuff done. So much so that I had time to write this blog.

So what does this mean? Do we all need throw our phones in a recycle bin for a day to really come to terms on how much we rely on them? Do we get rid of all these smart phones that make our life simpler, but might make us dumb from dependence? Or do we just once in awhile, need to remember the importance of living again… and not just digitally?

Whatever it may be… There’s an iPhone 5 on its way from America to ACK today between 9am and noon. And to be honest? I can’t decide if I’m looking forward to seeing it. It’s funny how a lost phone helped me find myself, again.

Holly Finigan is the founder of the Nantucket blACKbook. she is happiest with a Sharpie pen and a blank journal on a beach in Madaket. You can reach her at holly@nantucketblACKbook.com or maybe by phone if the UPS guy shows up in Sconset before lunch.


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